Author Topic: how to deal with seperation anxiety  (Read 51589 times)

kizkiznobite

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how to deal with seperation anxiety
« on: November 13, 2006, 01:15:02 PM »
you need to get ready to go out making all the signals (self cues) very obvious - like pack up a bag - picking up the keys - making it look as if you are very intent and focused on getting ready
 
then you move on this routine to involve him/her - 'right then boyo/girlie am off - see you later' calm but no fuss or touching him/her - leave dog with a toy and a buster cube etc - slam the door - walk down the road 2 minutes and then come back as if you had forgotten something - in to house - totally ignore - no greeting - no voice - dog does not exist - then go back out again - then come back after 4 minutes - repeat and repeat until you can get 15 minutes - with me/ what this does is teaches them you are coming back - after you have it to 15 minutes - do your coming in routine - still no fuss etc - empty the bag - put the keys away - make a cuppa - then sit down and speak to him/her - daft voice time - will then what you been up to me been busy sort of chat - dont over do the fuss - pick up a magazine etc
 
eventually s/he will get the idea that it is ok to be left - and leaving means something good is going to happen cos s/he gets a buster cube etc and you are coming back
 
it might help to begin with if you leave a radio or tv on low - turn down an answer machine/phone signal so s/he doesnt get startled and can't hear your voice
 

xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #1 on: November 13, 2006, 06:50:04 PM »
Great thread which I'm sure lots will find useful!

Can i check something?

- 'right then boyo/girlie am off - see you later' calm but no fuss or touching him/her - leave dog with a toy and a buster cube etc - slam the door - walk down the road 2 minutes and then come back as if you had forgotten something - in to house - totally ignore - no greeting - no voice - dog does not exist - then go back out again - then come back after 4 minutes - repeat and repeat until you can get 15 minutes


You leave the house for 2 mins, then come back... ignore.... then after a few mins go back out or later the same day? I think what I'm trying to ask is do you keep leaving the house like a mad woman over and over in the same 'session' until you managed 15 mins or would you build up to the 15 mins over a few days? All in one go or spread it out...  ???


kizkiznobite

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #2 on: November 13, 2006, 07:13:14 PM »
you leave the house like a mad woman - over a period of 2 to 3 days until you can leave for 15 minutes :)
« Last Edit: November 13, 2006, 07:22:44 PM by kizkiznobite »

toppy

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #3 on: November 13, 2006, 07:17:34 PM »
Thats great Kiz, thanks!


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xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #4 on: November 13, 2006, 08:10:58 PM »
Great Kiz... I got the mad woman bit down to a fine art!

xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #5 on: November 13, 2006, 08:14:24 PM »
Ok....another question....

What if
a) he barks when you leave and when you come back......?
b) you hear him barking on your return....?

(Or is that the same thing?)

Do you still go in or wait for quiet??

kizkiznobite

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #6 on: November 13, 2006, 08:16:04 PM »
how long does it take him to go quiet when you leave

xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #7 on: November 13, 2006, 08:34:30 PM »
He's quiet when we leave.. we always leave him occupied..

I was asking as it is something i never got my head round in the very early days... It is easy to get it completely wrong and give the wrong signals...

Now he's quiet when we leave and when we get back (what happens in between we have no idea!)

kizkiznobite

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #8 on: November 13, 2006, 08:35:48 PM »
 ;D ;D well - as he is at that age........ ;D he prob can't wait for you to go out of the house

xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #9 on: November 13, 2006, 08:37:17 PM »
LOL you are probably right there!!

Cheeky little monkey that he is!

Back to the question tho... what should we have done if we'd got back to him barking?

kizkiznobite

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #10 on: November 13, 2006, 08:39:31 PM »
it would depend on lots of things

if it was a greeting bark he heard the car/you etc

if it was a threat at door bark - he heard noise and didnt recognise it was you

if it was a stress bark and it had obv been going on some time - prob since being left

really depends

xtine

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #11 on: November 13, 2006, 08:41:58 PM »
In our case it would have been the stress type.
Now we get the greeting bark.. once he hears the key in the lock

schnozzles

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #12 on: February 05, 2007, 07:47:18 PM »
Wayhey!! I've got a whole week off at the end of the month (in between jobs) so I can spend a couple of days doing this with Mollie :D At the minute she just legs it over the fence to the nice neighbours (we have a large cat/small dog flap), which neither of us mind particularly, but it'd be nice for her to feel happy and secure at home.

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #13 on: February 24, 2007, 10:02:37 PM »
ive never left gracie, would it be fair/ easier to do it now we in a new house?

and if we mostly go out in the car, should i got out in the car for 2 mins etc, or mix and match car and walking, as i can go out house to garage with no barking as soon as i start car she goes mad, with a you've forgotten me kinda thing.
i can leave her closed behind doors and in the car no probs too, so she doesnt have a sepration issue, she just needs to get used to being in the house alone.

kizkiznobite

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Re: how to deal with seperation anxiety
« Reply #14 on: February 24, 2007, 10:09:07 PM »
yep - go for it - all new - make the cues obvious - as in the keys rattling - picking up bag talking to your self etc etc but dont look at her - just a bye then - see you later attitiude - she will cope  :)